Revealed! What mums desperately want...
These things, in no particular order, would make my life better...
1) A manservant
I would dearly love to be greeted as I fall through the door exhausted from work by an easy on the eye gentleman, bearing a gin and tonic and asking me if I would prefer the goats cheese and caramelised onion in filo or the spicy tagine for tea. And I want him to be able to iron. And clean properly. And know enough physics and maths to help with the bits of my sons GCSE homework which Im clueless on. Oh, and play jazz piano.
2) A micro pig
You cant be in the presence of a micro pig and feel anything other than unutterable wonder. There is something about a miniature animal which makes me want to skip through wildflower meadows with it running joyfully beside me. I would also accept a tiny donkey as an alternative. Or a little goat.
3) A job for my neighbour
Guys dont come much nicer than Steve. Hes a great dad to three young kids, he can run up a Halloween costume in under an hour, bake a cake, host a party for ten four year olds without having a nervous breakdown while at the same time being the sort of husband who always knows exactly the right time to crack open a bottle of Prosecco and dash out for a bunch of non-garage flowers. And hes been made redundant. And it stinks. And I want him to have a new job.
4) Red shoes
When I was 18 I had the perfect pair of red shoes. I wore them one night and was swept off by a First Division footballer - no Premiership back then who bought me cocktails and took me to a casino. A taste of glitz rare that was for a girl from a Midlands council estate
Who knows what might happen now, at 49, if I could get shoes even half as perfect.
5) My own personal flotation tank
For those days when your teenagers are insisting on going to clubs in far distant towns because everyone elses mum is letting them go, announcing that from now on they are only eating sushi and Coco-Pops and insisting that wasnt them on the back of that motorbike flashing through town. Honestly mum. Give me a minute my lovelies, Im just off for a quick float
Catherine Moore is desperately clinging on to her forties in the south Cotswolds. She is a single mother of two teenagers, has two ill-behaved dogs and teaches in a school for children with special needs. She thinks a twenty six hour day might just make it possible to get through about half of her daily to do list...
What do you really want for Christmas? It might be here ...
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